Walking into 2019

I'll be honest.  This is hard but I'm determined.  This will be posted somewhere prominent to remind me when there is slippage.  There is an adult philosophy course beginning here in this small town for which I feel especially grateful.  It begins by reminding me what a spectacular miracle it is to be a  human being alive in this incredibly wondrous universe.  It mentions how many of us sink down into the comforts of routine and habit forgetting the wonder and awe of life.  My intention is to live in a state of wonder and awe from this point foward! KAS

Invisible Nets of Love

These nets of love are strong and beautiful.  They gather us all together and support us so we can each do our work to make our world a more just and welcoming place for ALL.  May they heal what is wrong and uplift what is wholehearted.  KAS

Less than a Man's Pay

She said these words sometime around 1861!  Think about that!   Think how long women have been fighting for equality. The truth is, as I see it, when human beings value decency and humanity and equality, they are driven by their concern for their fellow creatures.  Sometimes the money follows but often it doesn't because the opposing force...the one which worships money over humanity has a completely different idea of what matters.  Even though I know it's a complex subject, that difference seems to be what is at the core the current division in the world.  KAS

In case you're interested, as I was, there is a monument in Clara Barton's honor at Antietam.  No statue though.

Shifting

This is certainly something I aspire to and I'd like to think I'm making progress.  Truth is, there is still work to be done in this arena.  It is shifting though. That I am certain of.  Things I once valued in an abstract way have become much more real and much more precious.  Truth, Justice--REAL justice, and liberty FOR ALL has taken on a new level of poignancy.  KAS

Breathe--The Chapter is Not the Story

Sometimes, chapters are long.  Longer than you wish with dense or difficult prose.  As a reader, I enjoy skimming over unappealing sections of a story. As a human being living my story, there is a way to do this but I'm not sure I recommend it.   I often listen to stories where I have the option to fast-forward or rewind a section; options not available to us as we write our real-life human-being-living story.  With awareness and thoughtfulness, you can change the arc of your story/life.  And, the most important piece of this for me is I am the one doing the writing.  I may be getting situations from an apparently random universe, but my response; my story, belongs to me.  I seek to own it with gusto!  KAS

Face It Till You Make It

And that's what it takes.  So don't give up.  Be kind to yourself.  Rest if you must but get back in there and keep going!  I believe in you.  KAS

Planting the seeds

Contemplating the seeds I am planting both consciously and unconsciously seems a worthwhile exercise.What do I want to see grow in my life?  ... on this planet?  ...in this society?  KAS

Find the Barriers

As deeply embedded and strongly rooted as they are, I hope time, self-awareness and practice will see them crumbling into ruin.  Wishing love to all even when it's painful.  KAS

Fountain Inside

This speaks to me of the very mystery and wonder of this life I carry within this vessel of a physical body.  No words are sufficient to say more. KAS

Life is Amazing and Awful

Focus on the amazing because sometimes it slips by me.  I recognize it in the rearview mirror.  Holding on has become a way of life.  What is "holding on" for some of us is a deadly situation for others...being locked up unjustly or separated from your children are two situations that come to mind as well as a gruesome event in a Saudi consulate. Meanwhile, here in my comfortable life, I pull a mantle of gratitude around me; relax and exhale through the ordinary and vow to do everything I can to tend to those who are in the awful of life or faced with the end of their beautiful ordinary life.  KAS

Power

I'm glad for this reminder as, these days, I often struggle against a feeling of powerlessness.  I will not give in to that mirage.  Every one of us has power beyond our imaginings.  The trick is to use it.  And to do so for the good of all.  That is the mantra I am carrying with me.  We have lots of work to do, people and we need each other to make it happen.  KAS

Laughter

I don't consider tragedy ridiculous.  However, I know it's easier to be maudlin and serious than light-hearted and focused on what's going well.  At least that's how it works in my world.  This inspires me to shift my thinking to look for the comedy in the situations I find myself in.  There is certainly enough grief in the world already.  No reason to add to it with overwrought emphasis on it.  KAS

Well folded

May your well-folded self be courageous, be righteous, be just and be kind.  KAS

Cathedral or Laboratory

Three letters.  G. O. D.  When put together, these three letters invoke an image; a response, a thought. Consider what they invoke for you.  There's a unique aspect, known only to you, as well as a universal one. Consider how your thoughts regarding this inform your life.   KAS

Friends

And, I am fortunate to have them in my world.  They keep me sane and help me grow.  They are the true gifts of the season.  KAS

Be Present

Like a visit to a foreign country!  And courageous enough to endure the deeply embedded impulse TO DO something.  Not for the faint hearted.  KAS

Only with the Heart

This speaks to real value.  Worthiness.  All those invisible treasures hidden beneath the surface of celebrity, fame, fortune and "success" as well as beneath the surface of poverty, illness, and simple ordinary existence.  This world does not compensate anyone for true worth because it cannot.  Nothing it has to offer can suffice.  It's the heart currency of truth, justice, compassion, empathy, vulnerability, and mutual respect. Those priceless jewels we cannot see with our eyes but know when we are witnessing their presence.  KAS

Life Is Happening Now

I find myself often on a balancing wire between "Don't wait for it! Go out and make it happen!" and "Settle yourself into the here and now and inhabit the life you have."  It's an interesting tension.  How I think about (judge) my life colors it.  And I'm the one hefting the brush!  KAS

In The Face of Rejection

This speaks to the core of what we truly value.  When I scan my experience for those who serve as models of this, certain people come to mind.  People who maintain their kindness, honesty and integrity even while being maligned and battered in public.  I choose to continue to focus my intentions and thoughts and hopefully my actions in this direction.  I seek to be the thermostat rather than the thermometer.  KAS

Forgive Yourself

Ahhhh, forgive.  Let it go.  Release the clutches of guilt and regret on your heart.  Shake it off and carry on with your light and your wonderful life.  It's only about the love.  KAS

Self-Care=Survival

This is worth reminding myself of often.  The amount of guilt that loiters around in the corners of my inner world chastising me for anything perceived self-indulgent is a most challenging opponent to self-worth AND self-care.

The current power outage has brought things into stark relief.  Things I can control and things I cannot.  It's not very pretty but it is revealing.  Light, heat, hot beverages and food, not to mention the luxury of a shower are no longer taken for granted.  And let's not even begin to discuss the intangible things like good humor and patience amidst the discomfort.  KAS

Choice

Some people have a tough time with this. 

I find it is helpful to remind myself of this whenever I’m crabby about a situation in my life. Remembering that I do have a choice and that I’m free to make a different one at any time really puts a different spin on how I navigate unpleasant situations.  It’s a way to take back your own power. 

Love Is Universal

This was an expanded way of seeing love.  Makes me realize the meaning I have for a word is so often small.  I want to begin to add shadow and texture and color and light to the words I often use.  Things like love and life hold such complexity and nuance.  KAS

Remember For Tough Times

Sometimes it's difficult to determine the difference between negativity and appropriate outrage at what is going on.  I struggle with that these days. That being said, it's helpful to review these points as a juxtaposition. I will not lose hope in what is true and just and decent.  KAS

Silence

Those who have been reduced to silence, once, know it best, 

but know also that they can hear it. 

Edmund Jabès

On that thought, I'm going to be silent.  Wishing you the same.  KAS

Compassion

Exactly!  This is not always easy.  I often want to call down the same judgment I'm prone to give others on myself.  It's a true mind shift to become my own defender.  KAS

You Owe Yourself

Forget the "make it count" stuff.  I'm weary from all the thoughts of "making it count" and being memorable and all the other pressure I feel about doing something significant.  It distracts me from actually "being" alive and relishing that physical reality.  For example, walking in the woods is an exercise in reviewing my "to do" list, rehashing incidents in the recent past, coming up with plans for the immediate future (in order to "make it count")

OR
it can be an experience of the senses...listening to the sounds of the "silent" forest; smelling the unmistakable cloud of cedar when I reach that certain juncture; noting the changes in the colors and the play of the light along the way; hearing the change in the tone of the creek; the feel of my physical body breathing and moving along; a way to actually experience and preserve the memory of being here and now as a human being alive on this planet.
Oh!  And finally, if you can pull off more than an hour, go for it!  Take as many hours as you can squeeze out of the day!   I'll stop "talking" now!  KAS

The 8 Rules

George was a wise human being.  His "rules" are challenging and I confess to breaking them more than a few times.  For example, I hate losing and I've done my share of squealing, lord knows!  KAS

The Gift Mary Oliver

How does one dare to follow Mary Oliver??  Hoping non-believers can appreciate the overall sentiment.  KAS

Rain

I'm not sure why this touched me, but it did.  The inability to differentiate grief from joy gives me pause as well as the thought of the "something other surging against my heart".  Finding the vocabulary to describe the inner workings is challenging.  There don't seem to be enough words to describe the myriad of emotions skittering around in a human heart.  Zora Neale Thurston certainly does a masterful, awe-inspiring job of it, though.   And her abilities to describe the natural world go over the top!  I just finished a reread of Their Eyes Were Watching God and it's as if there is music in her sentences.   

Thank you

And I hope to be that person for others.  And for those times I fell short of the mark, which sadly may be to those closest to me, I offer my sincerest regret and solemn intention to do better in the future.  KAS