Not About Could Have Beens

I love this quote because there have been many times when I've said I'd try to do something for

a supervisor or employer and had them respond with a version of "we don't 'try', we do." 

I wish, at the time, I'd had the courage to reply with "that's a crock of #*$*!"  There isn't a truly living person on earth who hasn't tried and failed a time or two or three.  To be shamed for it is wrong. It's a sign of courage in my book. People need to be encouraged to risk failure.  It's a superb teacher!  kas

Wet Nurse

Wet Nurse

Dry bones of babies

Lie crumbling to dust 

Disintegrating into fragments

Feeding the soil beneath 

She holds another's child to her breast

Feeling the tug of its lips on the nipple

Of her heart…a strong current of connection

From the warm vibrant skin of life in her arms

To the desert of death where her own infants lay.

How does it feel to have the rich, fertile, vibrancy of life

drawn from the center of her own living skeleton

Now nourishing a breathing child she did not bear

Who enslaves her after stealing the life from her loins

The milk from her breasts…actual living pieces of her...

now mere memories

The sky is weeping as I write these words, 

strong gusts of grief

raining down upon this earth, 

raging in ancient

lamentation at the injustice and the trauma.

We carry the memories of these dark baby corpses…

A woman's inmost heartbreak etched in forever scars

across our psyche and our society.  

They continue to pulse and throb in pain and fury,

festering here in the future where 

those children would have been.

Kathy A Stilwell

Note:  This was prompted by this story I read recently.  

Truth Grows Gradually

This is causing me to ponder my own experience with truth.  

It's something I've taken for granted all my life.  

Now I'm asking myself what truth is exactly.  

Facts?  Belief?  Highly subjective?  All of the above!  kas

Truth Doesn't Care

Some of the truth I'm seeing exhibited by the repulsive behavior 

of human beings toward their fellow occupants of this planet 

slashes through my optimistic belief that nearly all humans 

are more decent than despicable.  Nonetheless, I continue to 

hope the truth of decency vanquishes the truth of despicable. kas

The Severe Mercy of Acceptance

The truth these days, elusive as it seems, does seem to call for 

a severe mercy.  I'm still grappling with this.  kas  

Breathing

This sentiment fits so many relevant topics.

in particular, every patient suffering from COVID-19, 

every healthcare worker doing what they can to help them breathe, 

brutality to others, both in actuality and metaphorically,

our atmosphere, 

our water.  

Breathing is life. kas

Pay Attention

That Mysterious "Other" with many names...none of which are sufficient or accurate. kas

In Your Solitude

Self Awareness Can Be Painful

It's been humbling to encounter this hypocrisy within myself.  

More so than ever before in my life.  It's horrifying to realize the loathsome

behaviors and mindsets I'm condemning in others 

lurking within my own interior halls.  Mea culpa.  kas

Which End of the Needle

Sometimes you pierce the cloth and sometimes you place the thread.

No matter which, let's make it true, and make it fair, for EVERYONE. kas 

What You Can Plan

Absolutely love how this thought shifts things around in my universe. kas

Someone Who Told The Truth

It's amazing how valuable simple truth is these days.  And how rare.  kas

Cocoons

Author Unknown

Hoping you're feeling your wings!  Looking forward to sprouting mine!  kas

Soul

This is the best description of soul I've encountered so far.  kas

Nothing Lasts Forever

This thought was completely new to me and one I'm continuing to ponder.

  Loving someone or something does take on an air of familiar which can

become what you could call boring, and therein lies the challenge of being

alive and awake enough to be alert to the opportunities for revisioning, 

discovering new depths and alternate angles.  It's bringing a fresh perspective into

a relationship, a new attitude toward the world around you.  That makes "forever" interesting. kas

We Guess

I want to guess on the side of fairness, dignity and decency for every living being. kas

Nature Nurtured, Tutored and Protected

A quote from "Where the Crawdad's Sing";  I am much older than the character

saying these words, however, I can say without hesitation that Nature has done

the same for me.  Looking back, I recognize the indelible marks

 left on me even without my awareness. I carry the genes of both my grandfather's--

the one who grew hops and the one who grew roses.  kas

Journey-work of Stars

I fell in love with this idea the moment I encountered it.  If a blade of grass

is this amazing, think how astonishing a human being is?  kas

Want To Be Here

Growing Old

Not exactly uplifting but true.  It's ironic to begin to get a grip on

who you want to be in the world as this is happening.  kas

History

We’ve allowed toxic pockets of immoral voices to infiltrate our society depriving vast swaths of citizens of the oxygen required to live, cohabitate, and cooperate equally with others. This deadly virus inserted into our narrative is harming our healthy cells from the inside out. These ideologies have been injected by individuals and organizations with the intention of disrupting our way of life and remodeling it for their own purposes. Those purposes are extremely suspect. They do not include the values our country strives for of liberty and justice FOR ALL. Their purposes are malignant.  Their methods are underhanded and unprincipled. This mindset of domination, disruption and denigration is ancient.  Echoed from pharaohs, pharisees, plantations, banana republics, empires, colonization and oppressive regimes across the centuries. 

COVID 19 required that we remove ourselves from the noise and frenetic activity of “normal“ life. For many, we gained a time of reflection, a chance to return to ground and center ourselves in the basic ordinary delights of simply being alive. It returned us to ourselves and our own sense of what is of value as individuals, to our families, to our neighborhoods, our communities, our country and our planet. It reminded us of the importance of connection with others, the natural world, green spaces, essential services, adequate health care, good planning, unity and many other elements of humanity. 

Witnessing the murder of George Floyd launched us into taking action in order to voice those values and demand an end to this toxic narrative leaking its deadly infection throughout our society and our global body. It’s nothing new it’s just become more visible and our eyes have been refracted so we can see more clearly. We are still in search of the ultimate vaccine that will lay this toxic virus to rest. Let it be that we find it in time. kas

Full of Gaping Life

Its so easy to lose sight of this although living here certainly

makes it quickly and easily accessible.  kas

Embrace Change

Its easy to get stuck in the "all or nothing", "either/or" duality where you 

pick a side and stick to it no matter what.  Change means going into

areas where things aren't always so easy to designate as good or bad.  

There's a mixture of both in any direction you look.  

It takes courage. It feels awkward and uncomfortable.  Go anyway.  kas

Make Room In Your Heart

This is meant in the most positive way possible.  kas

What Would Your Life Be Like?

Nothing to add.  kas

Friendship

The peaceful protests have given me more hope than anything

I've witnessed over the past three years.  May the gross injustice to

people of color be transformed by the love and solidarity and real change

brought about by people of all colors working together to bring it about. 

Love will win over fear.  We are witnessing it.  Let. It. Be!!  kas

The Body Knows

This has been a strong, recurring theme for me lately.  

I'm finding it wise advice even though it

often feels unfamiliar and awkward.  

The training to ignore, and/or reject my body is strong. 

"Stop crying!" "Stop yelling!" "Be quiet."  "Be good." "Don't upset anyone."

That training has been going on for a very long time. Its deeply ingrained. kas

Still, We Carry On

If we can find the courage to be in our fragile body where the pain lives 

instead of walling it off or ignoring it as most of us are taught to do,

we can begin to heal and grow stronger from these vulnerabilities. 

We may experience the wonder of the treasure hidden in the cracks.  kas

Silencing Yourself?

  It's so much easier to shut down rather than engage in uncomfortable topics 

where one feels insecure.  It's far easier to see things from a standpoint of either/or 

rather than navigate the potent terrain of both/and.  Learning a new way of 

doing something or being with someone feels awkward and unsettling.  

I'm learning not to avoid the discomfort but to gather my tattered fragments 

of courage and persist into unknown territory.  kas

Water

Witnessing thousands upon thousands of peaceful protestors all across this country 

calling for justice reform, day after day for over a week, amidst a pandemic 

it looks to me like a mighty wave of water insisting on it's course.  

My fervent hope is the necessary change will come despite the efforts to undermine 

the cause as rogue factions work against the tide and our leadership fails us.  kas

Something Stronger, Better, Pushing Back

Thanks to my sister for sending this to me yesterday as the chaos

and unrest continue across the country.  May we all focus on

the "something stronger -something better" pushing right back.  

Focus on the 98% peaceful protests, the officers taking a knee, the 

respectful solidarity of citizens of all colors gathering shoulder to shoulder

despite the dangers of a deadly pandemic to make their voices heard

in support of Black Lives and True Justice. Let It Be! kas